27. The Six Most Intriguingly Comfortable Park Benches in Palmer Square That You Must Sit On Before You DIE.
You won’t believe these benches! We scoured Palmer Square, in Chicago, Illinois, to find the six park benches your ass is gonna find so intriguingly comfortable, you’ll be glad you sat on them before you DIED! These benches are extremely perfect for observing the change in seasons, contemplating the cycle of life, and gettin’ hella transcendental with some Ralph Waldo Emerson! We’re not allowed to write more than four sentences in these intro paragraphs, so let’s do this!
“Sit on it!”
“Show me the money!”
“I’ll have what she’s having!”
“Hey, I’m a bench…look at me!”
“Horn broke, watch for finger.”–R.W. Emerson